Here is an uninteresting and possibly regrettable fact about myself. There are exactly three things that I am any good at talking about and they are, in ascending order of importance, Doctor Who, my personality, and my beliefs and morality.

The first is easy to talk about, because if I can't find people who actually watch Doctor Who (a British TV show about a time traveling alien which is probably better than it sounds), I can find people who (pretend that they) are interested in it and want me to explain its premise to them. Which is fun. I like explaining the premises of things I like. But it's also really difficult to talk about, because most of the time, I'm just monologuing about something the other person knows nothing about and not really having any discussion. I'm just...talking at them rather than talking to them. Most of my conversations are like that.

The second is also similar to me just explaining something to people. I like talking about myself. I consider myself an interesting person (if also a bit terrible) and people sometimes like to hear me talk about myself. I'm one of those people who would probably make a brilliant fictional character but an awful real-life human, but this comes with the fortunate fact that talking about myself is fun, both for myself and for the other person. They hear me talk about how I'm depressed and isolated because I am so intelligent and I overthink things. I ramble on about how I don't mean a lot of what I say and how I live for irony (partly true).

The third one is the one that's most likely to scare people off. I have been known to have conversations (sometimes civil, sometimes ones in which I raise my voice) that basically amount to me judging actions and basic types of people that I believe to be evil. See, my sense of morality is unfortunately one of those "judge the evil people, make the buggers pay" type of moralities. (And with that I've probably bothered everyone who's read this. Note, though, that I don't discriminate against people for things they can't help. In fact, I judge the people who discriminate against others. In other words...I only hate haters? one could say. But that does result in an awful lot of hate. Hate's honestly one of the only emotions that even remotely satisfies me.) But then I also talk about how everyone needs to "apologize for their existence" (i.e. do good things for other people that make their existences worthwhile. We're all valuable as people but if we don't prove our worth, then our value is never realized.) Basically, though, I like to talk about the way I think the world is and what I think people should do and think, because that, to me, is the only important thing there is, and I think it's a real shame not to talk about the only thing in the universe that matters.

I'm not sure why I'm good at having these conversations. I wish I were better at making small talk and talking about pointless little things that other people are aware of. I wish I didn't have to bore people with my esoteric interests, give them the impression of narcissism with discussions of my personality, or intimidate them with my loud and judgmental beliefs. There's just not anything else that's interesting or worthwhile. Not to me. And I hate people anyway, so I'm not going to make an effort for them. With that, I have branded myself as an asocial jerk, but I don't care.

(It also bears mentioning that I'm having a really bad day today and I was trying to write some sort of entry that explains some aspect of myself so people might read this blog and think, "Hmm, that's an interesting person, let me read the blog this person makes because I am interested in this person." But I've either failed miserably or succeeded brilliantly. How can I know until I get a response.)